For all of those politically correct individuals who were misdirected here, visit my sister first. The rest of you know a manhole as an access point to an underground tunnel: Subway, service shaft, sewer. Yes, folks. We are going to talk about crap. Put on your waders. I am certain this will get a bit deep before we are done.
We all know there are people in our lives who are consistently shoveling manure. They are content to pile it on top of another’s head and call it a hat. It may look like a dirty turban, but alas, a hat it is not.
The daintiest of feces facilitators will dish it out in tiny increments, often assuring the substance makes life sweeter. The coffee is already as dark as I would like it. Please none of your additives.
This crap conveyor has a little more heft and can spend hours at a time in repetitive motion. There is a twisted irony in the name of the implement: This purveyor has two distinct piles with the same agenda. Either Digger is shoveling someone else’s pile to show intelligence or is digging out his/her own fabrication to show intelligence. Neither showing is the truth.
The connoisseur of antediluvian artifacts is at the ready for every argument to breathe Zombie breath into the most minuscule of infractions or indiscretions, whether publicly acknowledged or not. You had long forgotten it, but recognize this version as at least slightly askew. The Dredger prefers those things which garner the big reveal in an attempt to shift the limelight on the quality of his/her proffered gradu.
Quite the misnomer, Excavator is not trying to free a fallen innocent from a well or tap the water table in the desert. Excavator is digging a monumental hole by piling the rubbish in encircling heaps, standing in the clear center unaware everyone within earshot is acutely aware of the effluvia.
The foregoing is not an exhaustive list of the sewerage shifters; however, it does provide a broad enough spectrum for you to recognize some of the many liars in your midst. Sugar is sparing someone’s feelings. Sharp is trying to appear brilliant. Dredger is exercising elephantiasis of memory. Excavator is doing a self-proclaimed service.
They all have something in common: Belief. Each one believes their prevarication is not only expected, but warranted; therefore, it should be excused and not labelled lying.
Crap by any other name…
…still stinks. The outcomes are all the same. Sugar spares someone’s feelings, but gives Quaint a skewed view. Quaint has egg on the face when speaking to Feelings-on-the-Sleeve. Or just as bad…FOTS looks like a total buffoon when blowing Quaint’s tenderly formed impression. Either way, neither of them tend to take it back to Sugar with an admonition.
Sharp eventually steps in the hole. Most often, Sharp’s customers have a chance meeting with someone who actually knows the truth about his product or complete ineptitude. How often is Sharp called on heaping mounds of offal? Not often.
Dredger may get some comeuppance when losing an argument, but rarely is it served when heads are cool. Inevitably, Dredger assumes Quaint was merely angry and saying things unmeant. Even truth can be excused as a subversive tactic when wielded in anger.
Excavator truly believes the organizational skill necessary to pile like litter makes it more recognizable as belonging to someone else. With only a little sorting proficiency, Quaint can easily see the initials scrawled on the bottom of every piece. How often is Excavator’s lying excused because of others’ lies, either in the revealing or in the comparative magnitude?
Slamming the manhole cover does not eradicate the stench in the tunnel. Eventually, the pressure of the vapors becomes explosive. The slightest spark of truth lights it ablaze. Anyone close becomes a casualty, either by direct demise or merely being coated in odorous ooze.
A Fish Story
Occasionally, fiction makes its way from the screen and the page to inhabit the mouths of our friends. We recognize the lies for what they are. We do any number of things to avoid the confrontation of the lie:
- Blame it on personality
- Excuse it as compassionate
- Blame it on situation
- Forgive it as ignorance
- Downgrade it by comparison
- Understand it is the only known way
What do these six things have in common? Hmm.
If you were utterly wrong about something which you had been shouting from the rooftops, would you want Quaint to pull you to the quiet side, away from your audience, and gently tell you the truth? If you found out you had told Quaint a rumor (instead of the truth), would you go back and issue a correction when you discovered it? Would you lift the manhole cover?
Take It Away
This is the first half of the subject for tonight’s Talk Tuesday. Remember, Talk Tuesday goes live at 1900 EDT (GMT -5), with discussion thereafter. Feel free to leave your comments if you cannot wait for the crowd to file in a little after eight.
Today’s post was brought to you by the letter E and the number four.
What are the dangers in not confronting the liar with the truth? Why do we hold ourselves to a different standard when it comes to the truth? To where does looking the other way lead when someone lies? What is some of the fallout when a liar is left to its own devices?
© Red Dwyer 2011
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