I adore excellent food; however, the menu in my ideal restaurant had to take a back seat to some of the other key factors which make it the place I would want to eat every meal of every day.
The decor must be impeccable to create the appropriate ambiance. Linen walls in soft Mediterranean hues. Stone floors. Leather arm chairs. Starched linens. Dishes of every shape and size matched exactly. Polished silver. Crystal glasses. Table-side wine service.
Down-lit tables. Fireplace. Sconces. Barely perceptible music.
Cigar and cognac lounge.
Soft-spoken staff. Efficient and prompt kitchen. Immediate busing of tables. Bottomless water, tea and coffee.
Pre-ordering available via telephone, facsimile, email or online. Membership available for opening tab accounts.
Food delivered via cart. All dishes served the optimum temperature under cloche. Check delivered to table on request only.
1. Age restriction: Absolutely no one under the age of 30. Subject change… up.
2. Proper attire:
- Hats. Ladies may continue to wear theirs indoors. Gentlemen may not.
- Shoes. No flip-flops, shower shoes or thong only sandals
- No exposed buttock clefts or cheeks
- Outerwear is left in the cloak room.
- Casual attire discouraged with the sole exception of jumpers
3. Alcohol limited to one beverage choice per course.
4. Reservations required. Parties limited to ten guests per reservation. Reservations cancelled when not negotiated within 15 minutes.
5. No cellular telephones audible. No electronic devices at tables.
With the serene atmosphere, I would be content with a dessert only menu.
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What food would you serve in this restaurant?
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