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    • I have more than 5,000 contacts. I have more than 5,000 contacts. I am unable to run or jog. Fortunately, I have children for that. :) Aye, I have been wearing sky-high shoes for as long as my feet were large enough. April 23, 2013 10:34
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Saturday Evening Post

We made it a week with no knives, fires or major catastrophes, but barely. The sphere has been spinning fast, and Clyde has a smirk for something which may make you smile. Grab a cuppa and snuggle into a rocker. Let’s talk.

No Daddy

Many thanks to everyone who suffered through the outages this week for both sites and returned when no daddy got around to doing their job. Based on emails I have from them, there are allegedly supervisors for the customer service department.

I still have to wonder how they managed to get a bronze Stevie Award for best customer service department. I did take the time to cc the Stevie Awards on some of my email exchanges. I am in favor of balance, after all.

Halfway There

letter lMonday marks the official halfway point in the alphabet (day 13). I sincerely hope you are both enjoying A to Z this year and getting some useful information. I can already tell you now, next year, we are doing something entirely different. Although this topic is near and dear to my heart and livelihood, it is one I prefer not to pursue in this manner.

I am really looking forward to your reactions to the posts set for May. I am a tad behind posting for May, at the moment. By the end of April, I will have all of May scheduled so I can work on a book… possibly two.

FTP

This quarter’s flash has bolted out of the gate, and last quarter’s book is on the calendar for 01MAY13.  Some of the entrants for the spring book are going to be a complete shock. You will be introduced to authors making their debut publications. Two are previously unpublished.

Join the fun! We have new entrants already. There is no reason you cannot try your hand at it. Unless of course you are just escared to find out how fun it is. *grins*

Dogs

We had an adventure at the veterinarian’s office this week. Cash, who has no love lost for the vet’s office, slipped out of her collar and into traffic on a very busy street. It took six of us to corral her back into the parking lot. For a dog a bit past middle age, she is still fast, even if she has put on eleven pounds (53 pounds). Change of life is hard.

Once it was all said and done, she was quite content to get back in the truck to go home.

Cash12APR13

Beau is a big dog, officially. If you remember his first appearance on The M3 Blog (at one pound, four ounces), it may be hard to fathom he is over a year old. Although he is not fat by any stretch of the imagination, he is a whopping nine pounds… which is all growls and teeth when it is time for his claws to be clipped.

He is pretty proud of his necklace… even if it is a girly flower. It does not taste good, though.

Beau12APR13

Bacchus was our main concern. His puppy worms were resistant to the first round of medicine, so we went with a different one. He also had kennel cough. Fortunately, at 16 pounds, we have no issue with his appetite, and he has doubled in size since his arrival. He gladly swallows pills as long as they are wrapped in cheese slices.

Beau hardly has to duck to walk beneath his round belly. Did I mention he is huge already?

Look at that belly! Click any to enlarge.

Look at that belly! Click any to enlarge.

Right Turn, Clyde!

Right turn, Clyde.

Right turn, Clyde.

Clyde was eavesdropping and has to wonder if humans’ brains malfunction when they are attracted. He sees nothing all that attractive about humans in the first place, what with their incessant doing of all things irritating… especially with cell phones.

So, my sister and I were on the tele for what is a ritual for us. The conversation suddenly veered, as it is wont to do on more occasions than other subjects, to attraction. We tend to discuss all manner of attractions from the vague Hmm. That is attractive. to I need those shoes. to full-blown, get-a-restraining-order-and-a-Rottweiler stalkerishness.

One of the perils of touchscreen in pockets.

One of the perils of touchscreen in pockets.

This particular day, I was content to relay a story of someone who butt-dialed me. In the course of everyday events, being butt-dialed is truly not that unusual. Unless you have not spoken to this person for a while.

Say, more than a year. Okay, more than two years. Okay, okay, almost three years.

Oh, and the person admits having your number on speed dial.

Oh, and on a number different from the one they had when you spoke to them last. Do I need to mention, a whole different telephone and carrier? Right, I did not think so.

Then, there’s the whole part about being certain I no longer had the number after all these years. (But you still transferred it to a new tele… onto speed dial…)

Besides being particularly creeped out by the entire conversation, my sister was curious. Who was this person and WTF?

She got the 2-minute drill, as in bullet list. One of the bullets was diabetes. When it came out of my mouth, what followed was, “Who would have guessed I would be a magnet for diabetic men?” Needless to say, she laughed until we were both nearly in tears. This post is dedicated to the one and only Valentine for making me laugh on a day when we both really needed it.

Genetic Propensity

Without getting medical-journal-like on you, people are attracted to others who have compatible DNA. Those with weak genes are most often attracted to people who have strong versions of their weak genes. It is a molecular correction for extinction prevention.

Over the course of my life, I have had more suitors, would-be suitors and stalkers (the numbers increase from left to right) who were diabetic, Type-2 diabetic or borderline diabetic (these numbers also increase from left to right).

Indeed, I do have an overactive pancreas. I venture, however, that is not the only reason they are attracted to me. No, it is far more than pheromones.

Sugar

The diabetic’s enemy is sugar: the sucrose of cane and beet sugar, the lactose from milk, the fructose from fruits and vegetables. The chief complaint of new diabetics (and some far after the fact) is the lack of sweetness in their diets.

I happen to be particularly sweet, especially to those I fancy. That makes me a sweet thing.

Size

shoppingBy the time most are tagged with diabetes, they have gained weight and had other complications before a doctor decides to test. Despite Type-1 diabetes striking anyone of any description, Type-2 is subsequent insulin deficiency brought on by a sustained over-consumption of sugar. In short, with too much sugar ingestion for the pancreas to keep up, it quits or slacks off. We all know what too much sugar gets us.

While I am no shrinking violet, I max out at a size 8. Ever. That makes me a little, sweet thing.

Exercise

Type-2 Diabetes can often be controlled through diet and exercise. Reducing the sugar and carbohydrate intake coupled with increasing aerobic exercise helps the body burn off the blood glucose and fat which will turn directly into blood glucose.

I like exercise. No, I am not going to qualify what kind, either. That makes me an energetic, little, sweet thing.

All else aside, I am an excellent cook in fabulous shoes.

It is enough to make an ape wonder.

Until next time,

Red Signature

Which A to Z has been your favorite post? Are you visiting anyone else doing the challenge? Ever butt-dialed anyone?

I hope you are having a terrific weekend.


© Red Dwyer 2013
Re-Blogging of this or any other post on The M3 Blog
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Copyright and Privacy Policy available in The Office.



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16 Comments

  1. Hey, that is not what I said while laughing uproariously through my tears. Come on tell the truth shame the devil.
    Valentine Logar recently posted..One of those DaysMy Profile

    Reply
  2. Oh, this post is so homey, I can almost smell the sweet potato pie baking…
    Does this mean that people with no taste in shoes are strongly attracted to you?
    The last post has been my favorite of your A to Z posts – that is, the last one I’ve read… like I said, I can’t see you this finishing with anything less than an A+++!
    hope your weekend brings out the spring in you and your shoe collection!

    xoxo

    🙂

    PS butt dial, no… purse dial, um yes… and the occasional teat dial (I wear men’s shirts with front pockets – good for carrying things, even if I do have teats!
    PPS – um… I think I be escared!
    BuddhaKat recently posted..L is for… LISTENING TADPOLESMy Profile

    Reply
    • LOL! I rarely put anything in pockets and since my tele is touch screen (that is it in the photo), I always have the screen locked. I do not oops dial often, but on occasion. And then there is Man Cub. He likes to scroll through the contact list for victims people to call.

      PS I hope you like language as well!

      Reply
  3. I guess I’d better take you off my speed-dial.

    I didn’t realize you had three dogs!
    Binky recently posted..Attack of the VegetablesMy Profile

    Reply
    • Cash was born here. She gets in fewer pictures because she is not often in the house. She is trying to convince Bacchus he really wants to be an outside dog. I think she knows he is going to be huge.

      Reply
  4. Red, this is a fascinating SEP. My favorite A-Z you have written thus far has been the one on beta readers. I have been visiting other blogs, as well.

    I’ve had two stalkers in my lifetime that I know of, and it was a creepy experience for me. I thought it was more psychological than physiological. I’m rethinking that now, though I’ll never know.

    Recently I’ve been getting butt dialed by the same man often. I didn’t know it was a touch pad speed dialing thing because I have a push button old cell I use once a week.

    It’s a laughing matter, and I might just tell him to knock off the sweets if I ever get to talk to him!
    Gail Thornton recently posted..The Regret of a Flower Giveaway by Gail ThorntonMy Profile

    Reply
  5. My mobile phone is an old model which needs several steps to speed dial ANYONE, so I have (So far!) not butt dialed anyone! 🙂

    Glad the dogs are OK!!! 🙂

    Love and hugs!

    Prenin.
    Prenin recently posted..Saturday – Tony runs out of electricity credit.My Profile

    Reply
  6. Excellent post.

    Made me smile and think….two of my favorite things ever.

    <3
    Candy recently posted..The Cement BridgeMy Profile

    Reply
  7. Heck, Red, I hate making choices–always have. All the alphabet posts are terrific. How do I pick the most terrific? Nope, not doing it. Can’t.

    Butt-dialled? How lucky can you get? Hilarious.
    Tess Kann recently posted..A woman of inspiration. A read of struggled beauty.My Profile

    Reply
  8. I’ve liked all the A to Z so far but my fave has to be I…simply because I learned a lot ‘more’ from the post.
    Do you jog/run with your dogs Red? if you don’t you should try it. 🙂
    I have to wait to move before we have dogs, house and garden(yard) is too small.
    Speaking of small…now I know why you wear those skyscraper heels… 😉
    Phil recently posted..Matrimonial TestimonialsMy Profile

    Reply
    • I am unable to run or jog. Fortunately, I have children for that. 🙂 Aye, I have been wearing sky-high shoes for as long as my feet were large enough.

      Reply

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