Saturday Evening Post

Extra Large Coffee CupWhy does it feel like a month of Sundays since last Saturday? Oh, because I have been away. Grab a cuppa and snuggle into a rocker. The snow is all melted, and we are back to autumn. Let’s talk.


Despite email failure and other assorted software woes, M3 is still here, and there are more posts scheduled. Some are from me. Some are from The M3 Readers. Some are even from FAB people who you have yet to see around these parts.

Hatemail logoIf by some miracle you read this post, comment to let me know if you would like to have your subscription to M3 mail back. I have narrowed the field of email providers to two. While one I despise, the other is a reasonable facsimile of what we had without HTML. Either way, Clyde’s last complaint will not be mitigated by it. By commenting your acquiescence to subscription, you will get a verification email (I hope) which will help your email provider not stop the notifications.

Fractals will return this week. I created some really beautiful images this week which I apparently dreamed I posted. I sincerely hope you like them because they brought me a lot of peace to make.

Right Turn, Clyde!

Orangutans are very social animals. As adolescents and young adults they live in small social groups. They live alone in adulthood, but interact with others. The exception is mothers. Mothers live with their babies in defined homes. The independent orangs move in and out of these home areas as needs or social situations arise and for defense.

During these times, they are fiercely loyal and supportive. They tend each others physical needs. Strikingly similar to humans.

Clyde is convinced humans are doing it wrong. Surprising, no?

Humans interject moralistic constraints on relationships, even transient relationships but especially sexual relationships. In furtherance of these constraints, humans subscribe sexual connotations to e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g.

Holding HandsFriends sit in a restaurant sharing only a bottle of wine discussing the death of another friend. In a show of support, they laugh about fond memories of their friend and hold hands. The married person waiting on the server to bring the entrée thinks this is a public show of affection, sexual attraction.

A man squats beside an open car door to rub the calf of a woman. The divorcée next door believes he is looking up the skirt of his mistress. She has no idea the woman has just finished a half marathon for a charity of which his child is a beneficiary.

A woman wrangles dishes of food, a grocery sack and a $10 bouquet of mixed flowers into the door of an elderly man. The bachelor across the street smiles thinking the old man has snagged a May-December prize. He has no idea it is his neighbor’s birthday, which has not been celebrated since his wife died and his children moved away.

Best friends hug and whisper in one another’s ears in an airport. A twenty-something dragging a carry-on scoffs under his breath lesbians should both be in bed with a man. He fails to know the women have just had their first visit in five years and really want to be in the same state to share their children, families and the camaraderie they had before one’s husband was transferred 2,500 miles from their home state.

Two thirty-somethings are knee-to-knee, head-to-head whispering. One takes the other’s hands. The waitress standing beside the bench waiting for the bus rolls her eyes and wishes the young men would get a room. She has no idea the men are adopted, one of whose birth mother just died in a car wreck. They are waiting on the bus for him to go to the funeral across town.

Enter Ape

Right turn, Clyde.

Right turn, Clyde.

Why do humans believe all touch leads to sex? For that matter, why do they look upon touch as something which should at all times be behind closed doors?

Touch is a tremendous comfort. Babies respond to touch long before they understand the words. Premature babies mature faster when parents use kangaroo care. When children are hurt, a hug and a kiss make the pain disappear. Massage relieves pain, physical and emotional. A hand squeeze reinforces support. Hugs exhibit sympathy and empathy. People who do not speak the same language hold hands during times of strife and heartache in support.

Knowing the tremendous power of merely touching skin-to-skin, humans should do far more touching for their own mental and physical health.

Why all the shame?

It is enough to make an ape wonder.

Until the next time the ape takes the reins,

Red Signature

How does the touch of a person who cares for you change your mood? Do you get the urge to hug or squeeze someone’s hand?

Hashtags: #touch #seeingisnotbelieving

Thank you for sharing The M3 Blog with hashtags.

© Red Dwyer 2013
Re-Blogging of this or any other post on The M3 Blog
is expressly forbidden.
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  1. Touch is extremely important to me, and to all of us I believe. Failure to thrive babies often recover when loving touch is introduced. Babies have a nursing reflex when one strokes their cheek. I need and get touched every day, which is lucky for me. I recall a time in my life when I questioned my own existence because of years of lack of touch. None of it had to do with sex or eroticism, it had to do with an existential panic. Now I do have the urge to reach out and touch others. It connects me to our human condition and we are all as one.

    I certainly would like emails to restart my email notifications of your posts. Thank you for this one, Red <3
    Gail Thornton recently posted..Flash Fiction – ErraticMy Profile

    • I have always believed in the power of touch. In its most fundamental stage, waking someone is as simple as laying one hand on them. Waking is not segregated merely to arousing them from sleep. One can be awakened from emotional sleep in the same way. Much love, xxx

  2. I have switched my customers that require email to Google Business Apps or Not sure of those work for you, but might be worth checking out.
    MJ Logan recently posted..Basic Campfire Building is an Adventure SkillMy Profile

    • I have GBA now. It is part of my fury with the Google block to the subscriptions. I have tested the plugin and receive email from other sites with it. I get the emails because my receiving address is not Gmail.

  3. Media, Internet, it’s all about sex these days. The messages we hear, the images we see. Our biggest stars turn everything into a sexual display. Is it any wonder people don’t see beyond the sexual?
    MJ Logan recently posted..Basic Campfire Building is an Adventure SkillMy Profile

    • I suppose I have spent far too long plucking the good from bad situations to be willing to judge others for appearances when I am certain I have no ability to know the facts.

  4. If everyone just minded their own business instead of conjuring up lots of vile and nasty scenarios then life would be so much better 🙂

    This is a great posting and covers the misinterpreted visual messages incredibly well, it amazes me why other peoples business is so important to comment upon. It is a crazy world that’s for sure.

    I am pleased to know that your Fractals will be continuing as they add a certain quality to M3 and one that brings us all together in thought. I am looking forward to your new designs and will be calling back soon to view them 🙂

    Have a restful Sunday with lots of TLC 🙂 😉 Oh yes, and I am really pleased that you are back too, you have been missed for sure.

    Andro xxxx

    • I feel a post coming on about the decided lack of occupation many possess. I agree with you it is crazy.

      I am glad you enjoy my art, Andro. It brings me such peace to create it. xxx Yes, I am glad to be back as well.

      • Your artistic talents are awesome, and your Fractals a joy to comment on, I always find them incredibly well-designed and they give us all food for thought 🙂 Brilliant.

        I really am pleased that
        you are back with us again 🙂

        Andro xxxx

  5. Yes to the subscription.

    I can’t claim innocence about wondering when I see the interactions between others. But usually it is a matter of human curiosity, not a judgement stance. I’m curious about stories, the back stories, the future stories. Sadly, I know this isn’t the thoughts that often go through minds of all on lookers.
    C. Brown recently posted..Pain and Prayer On Bended KneeMy Profile

    • Shamefully, we are in the minority, Colleen. So many assume what they see is objectionable. I have been delving into the mindset and causes for it. It will take me a while to reveal my findings because I have more to interview before I build the post. I will definitely put you on the list. <3

  6. If “premature babies mature faster when parents use kangaroo care”, imagine how much better they would be with Wombie care.
    Binky recently posted..Fun With SandMy Profile

  7. I don’t recall watching strangers and painting sexual pictures about them. Why does everything have to be sexual? Aren’t there more important things in life to worry about?

    I am generous with hugs and don’t think twice how they may appear to an on-looker. Nothing like a genuine hug to perk me up.

    I definitely would like subscription to M3 mail back. Nice to see you again, Red.
    Tess Kann recently posted..Broken ButtMy Profile

    • I am glad to be back, Tess. Like you, I am generous with hugs, and I kiss. I have held hands my entire life with men, women and children. I drape my arms around those who are seated. I simply touch. I know the inherent power of the connection when someone else can feel my heartbeat. xxx

  8. I keep forgetting to mention that I always get your updates, so something is working correctly 🙂

    Have a deliciously sweet Friday and don’t stop wearing your stiletto’s, after all not every girl can wear them, and offering such a wicked visual treat 😉 lol


    Andro xxxx

    • I am fairly certain it is because of your host. Your email address is old enough not to have had these recent “upgrades” because it was rolled into another platform. Those with the older addresses eventually abandon them for the new ones, which means the provider does not have to retrofit the patches. I am glad to know you are getting M3 Mail. xxx

  9. oh yes to the subscription – i tried to put my email in…

    Touch – keeps us grounded with each other – and go too long without it..
    I start to doubt I am real. If you are not touched in a way that acknowledes the physical is like taking the sun from a flower. For me. anyways

    Shame is man made. the physical feel of it is similar to regret or the like – the thoughts are what make it shame and the thoughts that create shame are taught us – Shame is a way to control the masses. short answer 😉 I stopped myself ..
    I felt angry sad and im not sure what else reading the part about all the different bonds that some one will misconstrue for sex..
    we forget we are all here together… if we assume when we see a physical bond that it is always sexual then are we ourselves always sexual?

    The sexual instinct – with the survival and social are three instincts that rule us even those whose sexual instinct is strongest will not assume something swexual unless they have been taught shame – and we fear being shamed ot less than so much it causes it to be forefront…

    I think..I am just winging it. but I think it may be solid. If we were never taught to hide and feel ahamed would we even really notice those caresses and touches that just connect us all?

    Much Love
    Lizzie ♥
    Lizzie Cracked recently posted..Quick Mental Moment – Black FridayMy Profile

    • Let me know if you are getting email again. If not, I will fix it for you.

      Like you, I have to have touch to remain grounded. I spend an inordinate amount of time working alone, which removes me from humanity. I need the touch to know I am still corporeal and not moved to the ethereal plane.

      I love you <3

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