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    Red Dwyer - Author

    M3 Memes and Covers (3 photos) ... See MoreSee Less

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    This seems like a great way to round of our posts yesterday - how many of these names do you recognize? Image by Megan Lee Studio. • Mary Anning was a British fossil collector and paleontologist. ...

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    Red Dwyer’s Killing us Softly is a monumental book of heartfelt and practical advice for getting through and surviving the onslaught of cancer and death of a spouse.
    With the use of real time journal entries and blog posts, the author reaches out to readers in a unique way to guide them through all the emotions, responsibilities, and processes of being the caretaker of a marriage partner.
    Self-care and the care of the children are her primary focus, as she becomes the sole head of household and cup of love for her dying spouse and surviving family of nine children, three of whom are autistic.
    The book is supremely well-balanced in a way that has never been offered to the public before. The journal entries and blog posts draw us into her intimate life as she grieves privately yet exhibits her strength throughout and beyond the dying process. The focus is on helping the reader maneuver through the seemingly herculean feats of love and physical care which are assigned to the surviving spouse once the diagnosis of cancer is definite.
    From discussion on diagnosis and decisions to be made, through treatment and endgame, Red Dwyer holds our hand and shares with us her advice for not only surviving but also claiming our lives as we traverse this difficult and often hidden journey. She discusses the role of spirituality in the lives of the caretaking spouses, and the details of cancer treatment as a partner in the comfort of her loved one.
    Almost all of us are faced with treatment options at end of life, and many of us don’t face them until we are feeble and sick and not entirely in a place to make those decisions. While cancer has specific decisions to be made, Dwyer discusses the choices we all make when faced with extended treatment of a terminal illness or allowing nature to take its course.
    From diagnosis to hospice care, endgame and beyond, this author will be ultimately helpful to millions, who before this point have persevered and survived in silence.

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    • I have more than 5,000 contacts. I have more than 5,000 contacts. I think there were a lot of people who saw this one. It is one which has so many interpretations it is easy to see yourself or someone else. Great to see you tonight, Angie :) September 10, 2012 21:16
  • Helping Keep the Power On

  • And Now For Something Completely Different.

Muse for Monday

Ben Woodard liked this post

Mantra is taking us spelunking. Grab a rope, a torch and a buddy.

Ideas are always gems. They catch the light and captivate our attention. What happens when we keep the ideas inside our head?

If we pool them together, do they fit into patterns becoming brighter? Or are they more like glitter, shaken in a tube? Mantra does not think they are either. Instead, she see them as the mineral deposits in a Crystal Cave.

This poem is image heavy. Clear your mind. If you have ever been in a growing cave, you will see these images readily. You may even feel the spattering mist from the drops. You will definitely see the crystals.

Crystal Cave

A cancer grows within your soul.
It lives in the cave where you let
Your emotions dwell, protected.
In the cool, dark quiet, it grows,
Building stalagmites up to reach
The fertile garden of your brain.
Sparkling crystals shine in moonlight.
They are ideas from the mind spring,
Dripped from stalactites, collected
On the ever growing cave floor.
Thoughts smooth as glass flow over ‘tites
Leaving shiny memory grains.

Each day more of you pours into
The rock garden maze until you
Slip from reality’s firm grasp
With no consciousness left to clasp.
‘Tites and ‘mites meet, touching at last.
The garden became a forest.
You’ve slipped from our world down into
A dream prison which once was you.
The bars all formed with the fragments
Of the dreaming mind gone stagnant.
Emptied of intellect and will,
Siphoned out when you became ill.

Lofty ideals and strong beliefs
Destroyed when there was no relief.
Perhaps, one day science will find
A cure for your unraveled mind.
Until then, we will still mourn you
And those dreams you couldn’t make true.



What makes up the crystals? What cancer causes the mind to stop trying to chase dreams? Are we defined by our ideas? What happens if we hoard all our ideas? What happens to our minds when we stop dreaming?

(c) Red Dwyer 2012
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  1. this is such a scary concept, and so beautifully articulated… it makes me want to make sure I never miss any dreaming opportunity, before I am unable to due to external circumstances. I live in my head, so without the dreams and imaginings, it’s pretty dreary in here…

    have a great day, Red!!!

    BuddhaKat recently posted..fly fly away with a fractal flight of fancy…My Profile

    • Did not mean to scare the pants off you! You know, I like to make everyone think. ;) Hope you are having a great day.

  2. My mind is like an episode of hoarders….too many ideas. Some past their prime.
    Bearman recently posted..Bald Men – Hairy BacksMy Profile

  3. I get ideas, but not the time to share, then I get more, and more. Then I forgets some of the ideas.
    Deb recently posted..Do These Make My Legs Look Thinner?My Profile

    • I think we all have that problem…especially as we age. I keep lists for it…and have gotten better about remembering the lists. I have a note on my desk which asks, “What is on the list?” *grins*

  4. This made me think of my father, I suspect it wasn’t what you were going for. Yet still, it reminds me of my father toward the end of his life and in the throes of Alzheimer.

    • You are not the first to mention Alzheimer’s. Sometimes, Mantra has you look at your relationship to the person in the poem, when you do not put yourself in it. Either way, it lets you fisheye. {HUGZ}

  5. I love this one, and I get it lol.
    Angela recently posted..What’s Your Beam?My Profile

    • I think there were a lot of people who saw this one. It is one which has so many interpretations it is easy to see yourself or someone else. Great to see you tonight, Angie :)

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