“Just blow in the tube, ma’am.” The deputy was certain she was intoxicated. This would be his eighth arrest this week.
The shrill sound indicated the machine had a large enough sample. She giggled. “That has to be the quickest blow job in history.”
Martinez rolled his eyes. He had heard it so often. How can this be? All zeroes.
Charlotte beamed. “I told you I was not drunk.”
“The Breathalyzer doesn’t register narcotics, ma’am.”
“Blood or urine? No worries. The only thing in my system is unadulterated love. That’s not illegal now, is it?”
“Not yet, ma’am.”
Welcome to “Flash in the Pan”
Welcome to the last month of this quarter’s Flash in the Pan. March has a word limit of 100, and this exchange blows a 98, just under the legal limit. The word for the week is intoxicated.
Click on the picture to check out the flashers who got ahead and have already posted their entries for intoxicated. All entries have to be in by 31MAR13 for this edition of Flash in the Pan.
Even if you do not have a blog, you can get in on the action. Follow the instructions and send your flashes via Ask Momma (under the About Momma tab).
Reviews!
Have you stopped by to read the reviews? The first edition has picked up quite a few and the second edition is just as appreciated. The third edition will be out on 01MAY13.
Happy Flashing!
Do you have a better line than Charlotte about the Breathalyzer? Have you ever been delirious with emotion? Did it affect your balance or driving?
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laurie
/ March 3, 2013I’ve had that experience of blowing zero with the breathalyzer, they all felt like a bunch of jackasses.
Red
/ March 3, 2013Most all I have encountered want to sample some fluid because they are never wrong. (It is in the report.)
laurie
/ March 3, 2013Fluid may never be wrong, but the half a dozen men and what was a questionable search at best meant they weren’t askin’ for it in the middle of the night. 🙂
Red
/ March 6, 2013Hahahahaha!
Binky
/ March 3, 2013Maybe not illegal, but love should be a controlled substance.
Binky recently posted..Optional Accessories
Red
/ March 6, 2013OMG can you imagine legislating that? Sheesh.
Valentine Logar
/ March 3, 2013I like that one, cute and sweet.
Valentine Logar recently posted..Flash Fiction 6
Red
/ March 6, 2013I am glad you see it. With so many hung up on the vocabulary…
prenin
/ March 4, 2013Never been breathalysed, but Doug was and it cost him his job as a taxi driver…
God Bless!
Prenin.
prenin recently posted..Sunday – I hurt a friend.
Red
/ March 6, 2013Just desserts.
Noeleen
/ March 4, 2013“Not yet, ma’am” – hah, so love this, Red. Excelent.
I remember when I learned court reporting and typing ‘Ma’am’ as apt. It’s not as common here as (my impression is) it is in the USA, to be calling people ‘Ma’am”, but I rally, really like it.
Neat and intriguing, Red 🙂
Red
/ March 6, 2013It is hardly common here. I have been told I am repressive for teaching it to my children. The silly reaction to it is it infers age. For me, Sir and Ma’am will always have a place in the world as they are terms of respect. 😉
Andro
/ March 5, 2013I was going to say that there is nothing like a good bl… But then I thought, no just say that you like the FTP and I do it’s really great 🙂
Andro xxx
Red
/ March 6, 2013LOL! I think you would have gotten a good deal of agreement 😛
Gray Dawster
/ March 7, 2013I agree with you on that one 😉 lol By the way I have been on RP and my profile is not working again, I think you are going to have to delete it and start over with a new one, maybe use the Gray Dawster, as this is what I am using from now on being that it ties in with my name as it were 🙂
NO… Not complaining just saying 🙂 lol
Gray Dawster xxx
Red
/ March 8, 2013Ugh. Fixed.
Frank
/ March 5, 2013Well now …. surely didn’t expect to see “blow job” in this post. 😉 Meanwhile, thanks for checking in on me, and my project that has been taking my time away is just about over!
Frank recently posted..On Arches
Red
/ March 6, 2013Great! I am glad you stopped by, even if it was a bit of a shock. I tend to do that every once in a while. 😉
Gray Dawster
/ March 5, 2013I have just two FTP’s to finish and I will be doing those sometime this week, hopefully before the weekend 🙂 Good luck with your latest book release it is a real honour to have read it, or at least what was added before the publishing date 🙂
It is superb work as always and I definitely recommend Mantra’s Book of Shadows to anyone as it is brilliantly written and well worth a purchase, especially at such a low price, of which I think it is worth a lot more than that 🙂
Have a lovely rest of evening Red 🙂 xxx
Red
/ March 6, 2013I am looking forward to you last submissions as well. Thank you for the praise for MBS. It was definitely a labor of love.
Gray Dawster
/ March 7, 2013You are welcome 🙂 xxx
Tess Kann
/ March 5, 2013So many words I didn’t expect to see here. Once I began hooting, I couldn’t see to read to the end of the post.
This is hilarious but sensational, Red. Love it.
Tess Kann recently posted..Sunday Snippets – Blog Hop #6
Red
/ March 6, 2013Oh, I got it backwards. I thought you read this one first. Hahaha! Perhaps the other one set the stage for this one! xxx So glad you got some giggles today.
novroz
/ March 8, 2013this word is difficult..at leasy for me. It’s fun reading yours. intoxicated by love 🙂
novroz recently posted..FTP: Teacher
Red
/ March 8, 2013I can see where this one may be difficult. It was still fun to try a new version of the word. Glad to see you flashing today. I hope you got my email. 😉 xxx