Anyone up for a rant? I know I am.
This blog post is dedicated to all the sexually repressed individuals the world over. Let’s begin with a few facts, shall we?
1. Every person on this planet was a product of sex.
Even most test tube babies were the product of at least manual sex. Very, very, very (enough it does not count statistically) few were conceived using only clinically removed ova and sperm.
2. Nearly every person on the planet will have sex.
Another microbial statistic is the number of people who will not have sex in their lifetimes. The numbers for intercourse are amazingly low. The number who will never engage in oral sex are lower. The number of those who will not engage in manual sex (“Masturbation” if you cannot ravel the PC name for it.) is lower than whale poo.
3. Without sex, humans would be extinct.
4. Sex is a biological function.
It is perfectly normal for people to have sex. They are mammals. Sex is the only way to reproduce. When done well, it is enjoyable and has benefits.
5. Sex is good for the human body and mind.
- Aerobic exercise which increases heart and breathing rates
- Creates endorphins
- Elevates mood
- Causes better sleep
- Lowers stress reactions and blood pressure
- Increases circulation
- Burns calories and fat
- Boosts immunity
- Reduces pain
- Builds muscle control
- Reduces risk of prostate cancer
- Boosts self esteem
- Deepens trust
- Lengthens lifespan
Since sex is a completely natural function, something everyone does at some point, is healthy mentally and physically, is legal between consenting adults, the question begs to be asked…
From whom are you hiding?
How about a few more facts, hmm?
brats mini-mes children were not the product of immaculate conception, did not come from IKEA and are not someone else’s progeny.
Everyone who is not you knows the stork does not deliver babies.
2. That hickey on your neck is not a curling iron burn. You are bald.
3. You did not buy the water bra from Victoria’s Secret, the CMFM pumps and the little black dress for your self-esteem, or you would not be on the couch in a robe eating a Lean Cuisine, followed by a pint of Moose Tracks.
Feeling good about your body and making it more attractive to others leads to the F in CMFM.
4. Your children have sex.
See number 1. It applies to your grandchildren.
5. You did not forget how the morning after.
Like riding a bicycle. You just quit the last time you got off.
You have them. So does e.v.e.r.y.o.n.e. else.
In your quest to fit in with the latest fashion trend, shoehorn yourself into pants two sizes below what you should have bought and not realizing you had worn out the seat of those jeans, everyone else knows you have them… they are on display.
Whether it is a penis and testicles or a vagina and vulva, everyone has at least one set of genitalia. Whether you choose to use the clinical names for them or the plethora of colloquialisms, you still have them.
If you get offended by words… let me repeat that… WORDS, you need to get a grip. Adjust your universal translator to the setting which renders all the colloquialisms into whatever word it is which does not turn your crank, make you blush or put you into a sexual predator mode.
However, you have no right to curtail my use of the clinical terms for genitalia or the term sex. Why? Because there is nothing wrong with it, and you have them or them and it.
A. There is nothing wrong with sex.
B. There is no reason to be embarrassed about sex because even your parents had it.
C. Everyone has genitalia, even if they call it something different from you.
(c) Red Dwyer 2013
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