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    Red Dwyer - Author

    Top o' the morning! After a day out of the office, I am forced to acknowledge the frenzy with which the country is intent on filling boxes and bags for the holiday. In the spirit of gift-giving, I have a favor to ask. Please leave a link to the store of an artisan you know (or your own!). Supporting artisans keeps the world filled with beautiful pieces and keeps the box stores from winning. Support local stores and artisans in your life and share the opportunity to do the same with others! <3 ... See MoreSee Less

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  • And Now For Something Completely Different.

The Truth Is The Truth Is The Truth, Amen.

Let’s talk about the truth.

The Truth,
The Whole Truth and
Nothing But The Truth

Telling the truth goes beyond just saying something which is true. It means telling what is true without leaving anything out or adding anything to it.

Euphemisms like “little white lie” and “fib” make avoiding the truth sound harmless. In fact, it is not. Lying will always damage your relationship: friendship, relationship, marriage. Always.

The truth does not change over time. It is static. Just like the sun rises in the east, the truth is faithful. It is far easier than a lie since it is one fact to remember as opposed to the original lie and the web of lies necessary to support it. Eventually, you make another mistake (beyond lying in the first place). You mis-remember and drop one of the balls you are juggling.

You can’t handle the truth.” Jack Nicholson, A Few Good Men

Even when you fully believe the person you are telling cannot handle the truth, it is best to tell them. Lies of omission (failing to fully disclose) are still lies. Tell the truth even if it will:

  • Make you look like an ass.
  • Hurt your reputation.
  • Disclose an unpleasant, embarrassing or hurtful secret.
  • Hurt the one you tell.
  • Anger the one you tell.
  • Threaten your relationship.

All of these things sound ominous and dangerous. Frankly, they are. But the alternative is far worse. When Mate finds out a secret you have not told, it is a lie which may destroy your relationship, but will certainly damage the trust you have built.

The whole truth means even the truth you do not want to admit is the truth.

‘Tis strange — but true; for truth is always strange; Stranger than fiction.” Lord Byron, Don Juan

There are plenty times when the truth just sounds like a cock-and-bull story no matter how true it is. Before you jump the gun, try to figure out if this amazing tale could be true. Not only could the truth be entertaining. It could be funny much further down the road when you know as (weird, stupid, incredible) as it sounded at the time, it was really true.

If you think Mate is adding things to the story, ask. Better to ask and know than assume or jump to conclusions. Remember, the last part…nothing but the truth.

Truth is like the town whore. Everybody knows her, but nonetheless, it’s embarrassing to meet her on the street.” Wolfgang Borchert, The Outsider


NEXT: Forgiveness

How does the truth strengthen relationships? What is your favorite quote about the truth?


(c) Ann Marie Dwyer 2011
Reblogging of this or any other post on Momma’s Money Matters is expressly forbidden.
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  1. Nice one Red. I’m kind of like everyone else, the truth shall set you free. But what about those on the opposite side of the lie? How do they handle going on from here.Galatians 6:1+2 says” Brethren, if a man be taken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” For those that don’t understand religious speech ” If someone messes up, Christians are suppose to lift them up with kindness, being careful not to be tempted. Be there for others, as Christ is”. Thanks. Love you, Grant

  2. I like the truth I also like your article. However I have sometimes found it difficult to tell the truth either because I’ve been naughty and survival mode kicks in or it has been easier to tell a ‘fib’ to spare someones feelings. I know this can be fraught with danger but to heap more pain on someone who is already suffering immensely feels like the only and just thing to do.

    • Surely, that is the definition of the slippery slope. Lying to keep yourself out of trouble is always bad business…If you have doubt, scroll up to Bear’s comment. As to sparing feelings, I have found best to be silent than tell a lie, provided the truth can wait. Thank you for commenting! Red.

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