Friday Follies from the Cell

Hatemail logoFar be it from me to hold Follies merely to the SIB. No, even my CrackBerry is not immune to Follies. Episode 51 of the Friday Follies comes to you from Guatemala.

Ever had a long day and looked forward to unplugging early to snuggle into fresh sheets into which your tired body could melt? That would have been Thursday. A tremendous day where I wore the battery out on the Crackberry twice before I got to this point. Over 200 emails and even some playtime with the kiddles. Housework to round out the whole SAHM persona, and I was shattered.

crackberryI lit the bed lamp and opened a fun book. Three pages in, the CrackBerry rang. Not a text message, a telephone call at nearly midnight. I did not recognize the number or the area code. I picked it up to hear the familiar sounds of a butt-dial and a child jabbering. As I disconnected, I idly wondered how my number would have been in the tele of someone who had heretofore never called me, but I refused to burn brain cells on serious pursuit of the thought.

I crawled back in the bed. Another two pages. Another ring at the tele. With a raised eyebrow, I kicked off the covers again to reveal the same child had called me. I hung up again. Before I could get back to the bed, it rang again. Ugh. Enough was enough.

I shook the mouse and reversed the number. Only then did I realize it was too many digits to be a North American number. I pulled up a different window to discover whose coverage area held that international code. Guatemala. Three more calls whilst I looked it up.

On Facebook, during the next two calls, I popped up a status:

FB status

When it rang again, I did precisely as I claimed. The CrackBerry went in the closet in a shoe box. I had hoped none of my children needed me, as I had talked to most of them before I had gone to bed. I settled back in with my book with insouciance.

In the morning, I was curious to see if there had been any more calls and how long the child had stayed connected to the shoes. 32 minutes. I never realized shoes had so much to say… or that anyone would say that much to a pair. Grinning, I clicked off the call screen to see texts. Apparently, my morning started too late.

There was the daily text from Momma on her way to work to start my day. There were two others. I open the screen to find messages in Spanish. Google translate to the rescue-ish:


Bad enough to be (internationally) prank called in the middle of the night, but to have the cell carrier let me know I had run the (international) prankster out of minutes and offer for me to buy m.o.r.e. (international) minutes to continue (internationally) prank calling is just beautiful.

What a great service! When you are out of minutes, your carrier invites the people you call to pay for more minutes for you.

All I can say is I sincerely hope it was a fresh card your child burnt calling me.

Red Signature

Thank you for joining me for the 51st edition of the Friday Follies brought to you by the stupidest inbox voice mailbox in the blogosphere. Hope you have a terrific weekend!

Why do parents give children cell phones to pacify them? Has your child ever called someone inappropriately?

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  1. I let mine answer the phone for private numbers way back when I had a land line. It was funny watching the oldest frustrate people into finally hanging up.

    I give the new cell to Shorty in hopes she’ll teach me to work the blame thing correctly. So far she’s learned to use the voice search and find any app in the world; I have disconnected my cards from her tablet since she attempted at $25 purchase on it.

    She’s only made one phone call, and that was to make sure mommy was where she was supposed to be.
    Laurie recently posted..Wordy WednesdayMy Profile

  2. At least most cell phones are too large to swallow. At least for now.

  3. Hi hun! 🙂

    Sounds awfully familiar!!! 🙂

    Unfortunately in my case it is call centres trying to contact me for various purposes, mostly involving surveys they swear I will not hear from again if I only sell my soul.

    So far I am averaging two cold calls per day, a third of which are wrong numbers or dead calls which cut off after about 30 seconds.

    I COULD go on the no-call list, but there’s little point given most are foreign call centres who ignore them anyway.

    Having a baby chew on a cellphone (I speak fluent American) is an amusing thought given what a babies saliva will do to the handset!!! 🙂

    Glad to have you back sweetheart – you were missed… 🙂
    prenin recently posted..Thursday – MH17 brought down.My Profile

  4. What? Guatemala? My grand kids don’t have the use of a phone. Seriously? I bought a new phone last August for emergencies. Haven’t used it once. Then again, I’ve a lot to learn about it but I can dial if need be. o_O
    Tess recently posted..Beijing, Day 5, Part: Olympic ParkMy Profile

    • Tess, you sound like us. We got a Tracfone about 3 years ago and haven’t needed it once for a true emergency, thank God. It’s off most of the time, and we often forget to take it with us on local jaunts. Only 3 people have our number and since we forgot our voice mail password, those go unnoticed. Living the good life here!

  5. Red,
    Why? I would have thought you’d already know in your bones that asking oneself why any human does something is a sure way to make yourself crazy…. not that there is anything wrong with that, but, it can get time-consuming…. My guess on that one would be the same reason they had a kid in the first place; they probably weren’t paying attention, and it came as a surprise….

    My kids used to enjoy the old call strange local store numbers to ask, “Do you have Prince Albert in a can?”, then giggle like loons and hang up… Thankfully, they are old enough that this was before caller ID was common… Once they grew out of that stage of humor, I had been able to instill some better restraint with phone etiquette, so it never became a big issue…. until teen hormones disrupted all of our lives, and chaos ensued…. Ah, the good old days….

    Nice, but, I’m like you…. if they aren’t watching the kid, it’s their lookout… as long as MY carrier doesn’t try to charge ME for the time….

    Is the weather there as strange as it is here in California?… just curious….

    See ya, luv…. take care….

    Ned, aka, gigoid, the dubious

    gigoid recently posted..Paint all of it in flesh tones….My Profile

    • “the same reason they had a kid in the first place; they probably weren’t paying attention, and it came as a surprise”

      Love this! Sadly, all too true, but well said.

  6. Well and why wouldn’t you want to load their phone card, I mean really. It is after all your fault their children are irresponsible twits.
    Valentine Logar recently posted..Your Azz is ShowingMy Profile

  7. I wonder who it is that has your number, after all how could it be misdialled so precisely and by a child? The answer, impossible of course. I would imagine that your number has since been eagerly erased, and the irritating phone user put well out of reach of it.

    A jovial posting but not much fun receiving the calls after midnight, oh no, that is frustrating and incredibly annoying to say the very least 🙂 lol

    A nice posting Red, now grab
    some zzzzz’s you deserve them 🙂 lol

    Andro xxxx

  8. What ever happened to an old fashioned teether? I don’t find it cute at all to see babies with phones in their mouths. I was a far more responsible and sensible parent as a teen than the parent of the child who called you. Oh yes, and no, it wasn’t an accidental pregnancy.
    Gail Thornton recently posted..Prose – Of Loss and LoveMy Profile

    • Your guess is as good as mine. This goes hand-in-hand with the video babysitter, nanny software and children under 10 with $300 cells. Meh.

  9. That was awesome!

    I once received a call from a gentleman at a call-center in Calcutta who, I shit you not, told me he was Donald Trump when I inquired as to who was calling me. I nearly pissed myself laughing while hanging up.


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