Day 11: Inlaws & Outlaws

Red

If I told you about my family, we would be here all day. Truly.

Blood

Let’s look at simply the outline.

1. Grandparent

2. Parents (lots of sets)

3. Siblings (8 of 9 left)

4. Children (9 of 10 left)

5. Grandchildren 3

Already, we are talking about more 30 people before we get out of my immediate bloodline. I write about my children regularly, so we are not going to discuss them.

My parents like privacy. (Reason #41 in the PRO found me in a bassinet in the neighbor’s salon argument.)

My husbands are in a graveyard near you. Except for one, who we have already discussed.

You have met the grandparents I claim. So, we are not going to talk about the only one of that generation not to kindly bow out with any kind of alacrity or decorum.

My grandsons are too young for me to feel comfortable sharing a ton about them online, and one has been removed from online entirely.

That leaves my siblings. I grew up with them in varying degrees. There, we talked about them.

Loyalty

I have been a firm advocate of the adage:

Blood makes relatives. Loyalty makes family.”

Loyalty is something my family shows cyclically. As is common, life intrudes on the best laid plans. In events of true need, they are there. If it is something I can handle on my own, they rarely know about it until it comes up in conversation years later.

I live 900 miles from my family. I have a sister who is only 500 miles away, as the crow flies, but she is not in a position to come to me in any event. So, where is the loyalty of which I speak?

Hatemail logo

In the SIB

My primary lifeline is the stupidest inbox in the blogosphere. Despite a plethora of inbox idiots, ne’erdowells and Lotharios, some of the most loyal people who support me are email companions I have never see eyeball-to-eyeball. They fill my inbox with jokes, pictures of wonderful places and hideodorous people and drop in just to ask if I am still okay.

They represent between eight and 300 emails per day.

RedmundPro

ad200silveronwhiteThe company who keep company with my company is the cream of the crop. Although members fall into other categories than merely this one, even the solo members have an indelible place in my family. I take care of them with the same attention to detail I use in my home. They are an integral part of my day and my life. They stand beside me as we venture into mal-charted waters, are willing to bloody the water on the other side of the boat and are all hands on deck when we are pulling in a haul.

They are a constant source of support.

They all live in my CrackBerry.

They all live in my CrackBerry.

CrackBerry

The next most loyal of my friends are those who have no idea what time zone I am in at any given point in time. They ring and answer at all hours of the day and night. Even when the call is nothing more than a gritch session about the travesty du jour, they are there for stabilization, endorsement, validation and commiseration. Once we are done with all of that, they are really good at being sounding boards for gauging the likelihood my resolution is unlawful, immoral or perfect. The or is always debatable.

They are worth every penny I pay for the 7,500 minutes per month I burn on average. Plus, a few thousand texts.

One 

There is only one person in my life who falls into all three categories and still is someone I can count on in the FAB world. We share things like fetish shoes, decadence, culture, gentility, art, intolerance of stupidity, survival others misunderstand, compassion and passion.

She reminds me I am different. She also convinces me I am the same, so I can know I am not totally alone.

Val

I love you.


Have you a friend who is family? Have you said so?

Hashtags: #30daychallenge #friendship #family

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21 Comments

  1. I have three friends who are also family. My two sisters and my brother. I can talk to them about anything and for the most part they feel free to talk to me. I say for the most part because for one of them work has dragged her down so completely our relationship has become more limited. Just tonight I talked to her about it, and we will talk about it again. She has always been the helper and now she needs help. I let her know I am here for her.
    Gail Thornton recently posted..ForkMy Profile

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    • You should know the helper is the one who is always at a loss for what to ask for when someone offers help. I know. I find myself there frequently. xxx

      Reply
  2. Red, you are so busy I have no idea where you get the energy to do all that you do. What a beautiful tribute to Valentine. I have a few online friends that I am truly fond of. If I singled them out though, I might offend a few others so I won’t do that. 🙂
    Wendy Reid recently posted..Winning Made EasyMy Profile

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  3. I have a small pool of blood relations in addition to my daughter and her family. Since I retired, my group of friends has dwindled but then expanded anew. Yes, indeed, I have friends who are family, at times more than blood.

    You are a fascinating creature of this species we can human because you have such a huge heart. I am not surprised Valentine and you are close. Lovely picture of her.
    Tess Kann recently posted..Freshly Pressed: Friday FavesMy Profile

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    • I think so, too. You are far too kind, Tess. I just love as loud as I gripe. Why hide my light, eh? xxx

      Reply
  4. Now my eyes are all skritchy (is that a word).

    I love you too.
    Valentine Logar recently posted..Flash: SommelierMy Profile

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  5. It’s a funny thing that all the online friends we have, and all the time we spend interacting with them, is a completely new phenomenon that barely exited 15 or 20 years ago.
    Binky recently posted..Artist In TrainingMy Profile

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  6. Given I was left unable to father children by my sperm donor, my life has revolved around my God daughter and her family.

    Mum Pat will always be my friend and we’re very close.

    Hubby Neil can’t understand me, but tolerates me because I have been there for him and his family no matter what! 🙂

    Dominic is a businessman, Rachel a tissue specialist working with women who don’t heal after giving birth, Emily and Becky are business women owning several properties each and hold a special place in my heart!

    I looked after Dominic from 6yo, Rachel from 5yo, Emily and God daughter Becky from birth.

    I got Emily through school and University, Emily earning a 2/2 in English, helped Becky occasionally through college, but Rachel did it all on her own and go a degree with honours! 🙂

    Dominic served time for drug dealing, but is now going straight.

    I couldn’t be more proud of of them! 🙂

    They now all have kids and a lively bunch they are, but I’ve had to beg off babysitting as I’m now too unwell to look after little ones, even if they are brighter than I am! 🙂

    They are the family I could not have and I love them to death!!! 🙂

    Love and hugs!

    Prenin.
    Prenin recently posted..Saturday – an early morning trip to the Co-Op.My Profile

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  7. This is lovely, Red – so wonderful of you to say.

    I can’t relate to such family or friends, not a bit, but as I read it I can clearly feel how precious it is. Wonderful 🙂
    Noeleen recently posted..HappenstanceMy Profile

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    • I truly believe there will be one who will unlock the door, and you will invite them in to stay. xxx

      Reply
  8. Red, what a lovely description of loyalty. I have family who chooses not to ‘relate’ to me but it is my parents that truly connect with me. They are wonderful people who I love even if we do not share blood lines. Hugs to you for Mother’s Day.
    Christy Birmingham recently posted..Mother’s Day Poetry with SunshineMy Profile

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    • I think of family in tribal terms by nature based on the size of my family. We accept others into the pack readily. It never seemed odd to me to accept anyone. xxx

      Reply
  9. I have recently had a situation which has highlighted who my friends who truly support me are and therefore like family.
    There are a few who are like brothers and sisters and I’m grateful for them.
    When siblings are not there to support, they are there and I’m grateful for them…and there for them, when needed.
    Phil recently posted..The importance of sharing.My Profile

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    • Like I told Ian, sometimes we do better when we choose our families. Glad you connected with this one, Phil. Good to see you.

      Reply
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