Not all of M3’s detractors hide in my inbox. There is one in particular who lurks on the posts themselves. Have you seen the little troll? This person routinely down votes your comments and gives posts one star.
Here's your star.
It is kind of like giving a waitress a one penny tip. Just to let her know you did not forget to tip, but sending home the message you absolutely hated the service. Ah, the perils of a public site. You cannot please all of the people all of the time. And there will always be one person who thinks everything you do it the worst. Meh.
Bringing the Reaper
Angel of Death
I am going to be the first one to admit there have been many references to the Grim Reaper, or to be honest (if you read any of it) Reaper Paulston. Reaper is one of the main characters in the ongoing story (which may well end up in a book). Any idea what kind of email it has generated so far?
Taking me at my word from Saved By the Bell, I got six hatemail. The most notable was from a woman in France, who was not chanting, Vive, la mort! Instead, she is determined I am the angel of death.
To her, I am promoting satanism and sending people to their death. She also seems to think my imagery makes people think it is OK to commit suicide.
Is she even reading the blog? Or did she just buy her PlayGirl for the articles? Hmm.
Think a lot of Myself
I am popular with the women this week. My next hatemailer hails from sunny California. She apparently did read Punt an Ostrich, well, maybe she did. After a keyboard-lashing about promoting cruelty to beautiful winged animals, I got a diatribe about (does any of this sound familiar?) about how narcissistic I am.
Great exercise...
You see, to ask people to live life to the fullest and celebrate and leave a legacy, I am obviously singing my own praises and promoting my own dubious good works.
Now, I am the first to admit, some posts are all about me (like this one), but no where in that particular post did I reference myself or anything I have ever done, even if I have done some of the things on the Victory List.
My advice to her: Ride an ostrich. I hear it is good exercise for both of you.
What I neglected to tell her: Ostriches bite.
Missed the Disclaimer
Wouldn’t you know it? Another woman griping. This one hatemails from Vermont. I cannot claim she read the post What do the numbers mean?, at least not until the end. She was quick to point out not everyone whose numbers are not within my [sic] guidelines were unhealthy.
In fact, her BMI was far above what I [sic] am telling people is normal and she [sic] is not fat. Maybe, she missed the picture accompanying the BMI section. And the explanation of BMI not being a fast number. And it is not a sole health indicator. And the disclaimer where I am not a doctor.
The Doctor will see you now.
Psssssst. I did not decide the guidelines. Let’s have a NOT list:
- My guidelines
- My idea of healthy
- My opinion
- My judgment call
I sent her a link list to the national health agencies of six countries. Idly wonders if she will spam the response.
You know you want one.
Spam Bot Honorable Mention
Not to be outdone by those who take the time to hand write their hatemail, M3 has finally arrived in terms of the dreaded spam bots. On the post, Little Hemingway, the bot found a keyword which whispered sweet nothings to its spidery circuits.
That’s right, M3 Readers. M3 can now bring you a link to a website which peddles premature ejaculation pills. Since I know you all want to be able to prematurely ejaculate, please rush to your email client and let me know to send you the link.
~~~~~~~~~~
I hope your week has been hatemail free & you have enjoyed this week’s edition of the Friday Follies! Hope you are at least somewhat interested in my return, even if I do not have the pills on hand!
Androgoth
/ January 13, 2012Hey if that French woman lands on my Space I think that it will either give her the fright of her life or have her jumping through flaming hoops, you do attract some bizarre travellers to your Space…
Never mind though Red because they are missing out on the real delights of your postings, and anyway who wants a visit from Crazy Frog or a Bot with no Staying Power 🙂
Have a wonderful weekend my great friend 🙂
Androgoth XXx
Red
/ January 13, 2012*Still Giggling* On my way to one fabulous weekend. Home before long and will be glad to have my bed back! Hope you are having a fabulous wee morning! Hope you can find anything else you commented on in Your Comments after I got to all of mine here. Whew! I made more than 120 comments in just under two hours. You all were busy in my absence! Good thing the tele will read them all to me while I drive!
Red. 😉
Marc Phillippe Babineau
/ January 13, 2012I got my first spam bot this week! Yeah me! I’m on top of the world, ma!
I saw I had 2 pingbacks, thinking they were good because of what I’ve been told in social networking by some colorful bloggers, i opened them without actually reading them first. D’ope! Might as well play a round of Blogopoly or Russian Bloggette… (you can see some more fake blogging words in the great, new feature….
Red
/ January 13, 2012Do be careful. Some pingbacks are more like pinbacks…as in pinning down the ears of your blog to some other completely worthless blogless site.
And congrats on your bot. I have to say, you are the first person I have ever known who was happy about a spam bot!! 😉
awarewriter
/ January 13, 2012*sniff* no hate mail in my in-box Red. Maybe I’ve disguised it too well in my About tab. Then again this may change after my latest post. I re-published my Sunshine Week award essay from 2008 with a new title “Why Unfiltered Public Access to Taxpayer Funded Science is Vital” so I wait for the backlash (or not).
John
Red
/ January 13, 2012I got my ping for it, but have not been over there to comment on it…now that I can! And there should be no backlash. Your audience has a brain. And how the hatemailers have not managed to find it with all the links from here to your blog is just another proof to your post 😉
Red.
Barb
/ January 14, 2012You must be a meta genius. How do you get all those wonderful non-related links. Do you have anything for window cleaning?
Red
/ January 14, 2012If I only knew! I think there is a hidden WP script which runs completely unrelated meta tags. I mean honestly, how do you get that spam bot on a post about raising writers??
liquorstorebear
/ January 14, 2012I’ve never had any hate mail! And I say some pretty ill-considered stuff. I think you’re getting it because you often hit the truth.
Red
/ January 14, 2012Oh, but your blog is so fun! Very little feeling hurting at your place. I need to come hang out for a drink and to read my horoscope 😉
prenin
/ January 14, 2012I can’t understand the way people have to rant before even reading the blog they are dissing! 🙁
Thankfully I just get occasional spam and the spam detector used by the WP system spots most of them.
Wish they would fix the bugs in WP though – I have to keep logging in to leave comments on your blog…
Love and hugs!
Prenin.
Red
/ January 14, 2012Who knows?? Better question is how in the world do they get here?? {HUGZ} Red.
valentinelogar
/ January 14, 2012We could of course band together and start or own club of hate the hate mailers, one star wonders and other social misfits. We could devise inappropriate things to do to them that would cause them to eat their own cockles with whip cream and strawberries.
But that is just a fantasy…I would of course never consider this in real life.
Red
/ January 14, 2012…more than once…*Evil grin*
bear
/ January 16, 2012TROLL that’s a new one but well said, snap judgements before true understanding of what’s being written? I gotta get me a blog!!!!!!
Red
/ January 16, 2012That would be one worth reading!