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Saturday Evening Post

macchiatoWeek, schmeek. Clyde is foaming at the mouth. Want to keep the news to a minimum? Grab a cuppa and snuggle into a rocker. We will be done before the espresso is cool.

M3, Flash and Updating

Did not blow up. Lots of pages got an overhaul, except, of course, the Updates Only page. That will wait until after I have done all my work on the FTP book.

OMG! If you have not been to the FTP page in the last… 48 hours… you need to go soonly. It is nearly twice the size of the last one. What does this mean?

Flashes from the Bistro will be the biggest collection of flashes to date. It will come it at maximum capacity and feature content (like the other books) unavailable on the web. There are a few which went from paper to the book. Do not pass Go! Do not collect $200.

Fractals

You all make my cheeks hurt. I adore the titles you give to my fractals. I have a sticky on my screen not to read what you have to say with coffee in my mouth. Here are this week’s Red titles:

  1. Eye of my Storm
  2. Scarab Shell
  3. Fold in Quills
  4. Wave
  5. Spin the Compass

#5 had the most answers close to what I named it. We had a tie this week for favorite between #3 and #4. #4 is on the title page of Wave of Emotion. Lots of you saw the moon, although I am really surprised no one saw the dolphins or peacocks.

Right Turn, Clyde!

When Clyde was reading about my wormhole, he never could have known he would be reading an email showing it in real time. First, a tad of background.

spoon on nose

Pure Talent

Little V is going to be participating in a research study on autism over the course of the next four months. Although I am opposed to medicating symptoms without treating the cause, I have acquiesced to this study for one purpose only:

It is the only way to get a psychiatric referral.

You read that right. In order to get a psychiatrist for my child, I have to allow her to participate in a research study about anti-psychotic drugs (which we will discuss in macro on another post).

No, this is not what has Clyde’s dander up. Well, not the only thing would be more accurate.

Press 1 for Stupid.

The initial interview was relatively painless. Answer 50 questions on a 0-3 scale. At the conclusion, I asked a handful of questions; the most important one was:

Where will we need to go for the study?”

The answer was: One of the USC campuses.

Followed by this: Is the one in Columbia available?

Short, sweet, I had to applaud the following of directions (prematurely): Yes.

We discussed the need for duplicate appointments, and in the coordinator’s estimation, it would be better for me to come for three hours on consecutive days rather than take “six hours of [my] day”.

You will see in the illustration below, Columbia is just outside the Third Circle of Hell. Do you see the arrow? Peruse the image and see if you can guess what is coming next.

Charleston

Two days later, I informed the study coordinator I had not received the directions to the testing facility. The email contained a link to a search tool where I could put in my address for driving directions. Yippee. Any idea where the address is?

Charleston

No, not a mere 80 miles away. On the contrary. 160 miles. One way.

Time Warp & Wormhole

123No, it will not take an hour to get there. Not two. Three hours is only if I can go 10 mph over the speed limit from the TCH through backwoods towns with one LEO and no jail, encounter no road construction or do not catch one red light in downtown Charleston at the peak of tourist season. (And here, I have no license or tags to hunt them. Pity.) The average drive time from my house to Charleston is a little over three and a half hours.

Wait, I skipped a part. Before we got to the 50 questions, I had to give vitals: Name, rank, serial number… address. I had to say not only where I live, but also who referred me to the study: A firm out of Columbia to whom the coordinator had personally delivered the invitations.

I was tempted to quote George Carlin and ask:

Did you walk to work or bring your lunch?”

Enter Ape

Now, if Clyde is going to believe the human race is not terminally eaten up with stupidity, a number of reasonable conclusions must be upheld (what a polite way to say assumptions):

  1. Someone with a master’s degree knows the distance from where he works and the capital of the state.
  2. The study coordinator knows the protocol of the study (which would have saved a second set of vitals and 50 more questions).
  3. Same person would think the six-hour commute would be unreasonable for a three (as opposed to six) hour meeting.
  4. Same person would have enough math skills to calculate drive time for 160 miles off the Interstate.
  5. Same person would not know the boundaries of the area code.
Right turn, Clyde.

Right turn, Clyde.

While I completely see the ability of others to see their commute as the worst one on the planet, Clyde is having a hard time figuring out how anyone with opposable thumbs to take off their shoes for higher math functions cannot see everyone who can use a telephone does not live on the party line.

It is enough to make an ape wonder.

Still…

Red Signature


Is it true higher education creates such specialty to entirely eclipse common sense? How does a person as S-T-U-PID keep a job in higher education (a medical school to be precise)? Can someone refer me to a retailer who sells wormholes? Am I the only one disturbed by this?

Hashtags: #autism #research #stupidity

Thank you for sharing The M3 Blog with hashtags and keeping me company this week.

© Red Dwyer 2013
Re-Blogging of this or any other post on The M3 Blog
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30 Comments

  1. Two words for you this Morning Red..
    MIND BLOWING!…

    Is there any wonder the World is in the Mess its in?
    Sue Dreamwalker recently posted..Friday Facts ~Making a DifferenceMy Profile

    Reply
    • So good to see you today, Sue. Frankly, I do not wonder… ever. Just about the time I think we stand a shot at redemption, I encounter another one of these people. Were it not for my friends I know are sane, I would crawl beneath a rock. xxx

      Reply
  2. Now we know where the movie title of ‘Dumb and Dumber’ came from, it really is enough to make an ape wonder 🙁 Unbelievable…

    Andro xxxx

    Reply
    • I think I probably should sit down and watch that one of these days. It seems to be the description for so many people I meet. 🙄

      Reply
  3. I hate when I look for an address and the business doesn’t have a website so you search through a bunch of crap to find.
    Bearman recently posted..Prostate Exam CartoonMy Profile

    Reply
    • More of that than you can imagine. I live somewhere with less than 50% Internet accessibility. The businesses see no point in a website their customers cannot access anyway. Ugh.

      Reply
  4. Ouch. Well, “Third Circle Of Hell” tells me you’re able to laugh even under the most distressing circumstances– a very positive sign. Sounds awful, Red. Hang in there, keep fightin’ that good fight.
    Mark Armstrong recently posted..I Don’t Mind Having My Name In Lights– Honest!My Profile

    Reply
    • Oh, my sense of humor may get really acerbic or sarcastic, but it never goes entirely away. 😉 We are going to get through this and more… rest assured. Great to see you, Mark.

      Reply

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